– from On Love by Kahlil Gibran

Happy Valentine’s Day Tiki Tiki-ers.

besitos.

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Nashville: Snowstorm 2010

Snow and ice fell on Nashville Friday, blanketing the city and surrounds with a glorious — if treacherous — icy white.

We haven’t left our house in four days.

Today included.

So, time that would have been mostly mine has belonged to others — my 6-year-old daughter, home from school, needs my attention. The new puppy needs to be housebroken and worn out. That means my to-do list has gone mostly undone and this pulls me mentally away from the present as I drift off to think about everything else I am not doing.

Truth is, this white wonderland has offered a rare gift, allowing me time to “just be” with my family.

In the midst of our busy lives it is a rare gift, indeed, to be given unplanned still and cozy moments.

And those only happen in the present.

If the present eludes you too sometimes:

Normal day, let me be aware of the treasure you are. Let me learn from you, love you, bless you before you depart. Let me not pass you by in quest of some rare and perfect tomorrow. Let me hold you while I may, for it may not always be so. One day I shall dig my nails into the earth, or bury my face in the pillow, or stretch myself taut, or raise my hands to the sky and want, more than all the world, your return. — Mary Jean Iron

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By Angelica Perez

Are you a “superwoman?”

Multitasking.
Running.
Going from one place to another.
Taking care of this, that, him and her, and everything and everyone in between.
Exhausted.
Sleep deprived.
Depleted.

There is nothing glamorous about being a superwoman. No one really cares. There is no medal or award for all the effort. Yes, “you” may feel good about doing so much, but that good feeling is usually short-lived. Why? Because it is solely based on how much you for others.

So, I ask you: What have You done for You lately? Especially in this holiday season of giving, appreciation and celebration.

• When was the last time you drank a tall, large glass of cold water (or bottle)? Water is so good for you…
• When was the last time you slept in (on a work day!) until 12 noon? (and you had the place ALL to yourself!)
• When was the last time you had a 60 minute professional massage? (Human touch is undeniably powerful and therapeutic)
• When was the last time you took a full hour of lunch? (not 30 or 50 minutes…)
• When was the last time you spent at least 2 hours practicing your past/current favorite hobby, the one thing everyone knows you’re so passionate about?
• When was the last time you went dancing, or sat down at a downtown jazz bar soaked in the live music.
• When was the last time you saw a Broadway show (or off-Broadway) or a play, or went to see live theater?
• When was the last time you had sex and allowed yourself to enjoy it FULLY, without thinking about what he/she was thinking, feeling, wanting, expecting or waiting for?
• When was the last time you took 20 minutes to listen to a meditation segment and relaxed your stress away?
• When was the last time you allowed your children to cook you breakfast or lunch, so that you can rest or read a book?
• When was the last time you asked for help — for anything: cleaning, childcare, work, groceries? Without feeling guilty or being controlling…
• When was the last time you let the house go, let things get dirty and crazy because you needed a break, or needed a nap?
• When was the last time you asked your partner for a warm, long embrace, and placed your head on his/her shoulder?

Now, what are You going to do for You today?

In this holiday season of giving, appreciation and celebration, I dedicate this post (and this video of Alicia Keys singing  Superwoman) to all women who do too much for others, and very little for themselves. May the video and the questions above, inspire you to do at least one thing for number one: You.

Angelica Perez, Ph.D. is a Latina, Mother, Wife, Daughter, Sister, Friend, Mentor, Writer and a Music-Loving Ivy League Educated Psychologist. She has dedicated her career to helping women feel good about themselves and live a happier, more empowered life. Visit her site, Salon Angelica, for inspiration and tips for healthy and balanced living.

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I have dunked my body in the turquoise waters of the Caribbean and the Mediterranean. Moments of personal Bliss and “All is right with the World” that I look back to when I need a boost during the gray days of winter. A picture of me, reveling in the magical waters of Cuba many years ago, captures the joy I feel when I wrap myself in bright blue waters.

So, to my delight the calming, escapist color turquoise has been named The Color of 2010 by the interesting people of Pantone.

“It is believed to be a protective talisman, a color of deep compassion and healing, and a color of faith and truth, inspired by water and sky,” said Leatrice Eiseman, the executive director of the Pantone Color Institute. “Through years of color word-association studies, we also find that Turquoise represents an escape to many – taking them to a tropical paradise that is pleasant and inviting, even if only a fantasy.”

Paradise. Compassion. Faith. Water. Sky. All wrapped up in one color, a color we can expect to see a lot more of in fashion and design.

Maybe this color prediction means little us on a daily basis, as we trudge through difficult and uncertain times.
But today, consider drinking in this color. Let it inspire you.

Maybe you need a momentary escape. Maybe you need to show compassion to yourself today; find new faith in the most important person — you.

Maybe turquoise — and all of its symbolism and promise — can be your talismán today.

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By Boni Candelario

Are you tired of being weak in your spirit? Are you run down and sick? Are you not getting enough sleep and nourishment?

I have been there. For almost two years after my daughter was born, I focused solely on her, my husband, and my job. I threw myself into the role of working mother and began comparing and judging my success based on my mother, grandmothers, and previous generations.

My mother and mother-in-law were both working moms who came to the U.S. from Puerto Rico in the ’60s. After they got married and had children they continued to work, many times doing multiple jobs, outside of the home to help their hardworking husbands make ends meet. They kept many Puerto Rican traditions of food, music, dance and family — including taking on all of the responsibility of work inside the home. They did it all. Todo. Without one complaint or day off.

I looked up to these Superwomen and used them as my standard. I compared my cooking, cleaning, and childrearing to them. Little did I know, they secretly were overworked, depressed, ignored their health and felt pressure to be perfect because of tradition.

For too long, I did the same thing. I didn’t think twice about where my next breath was coming from because I really didn’t appreciate that each breath is a gift.

It doesn’t have to be this way.

To change things for myself, I started to think about what my family and I truly deserve. Shifting my logic helped me kick into gear a healthier lifestyle.

I acknowledge that my body has not been pushed to its fullest potential with exercise and that I have not made sure that it rests. Like a neglected child, I have not spent time loving my body. I never saw exercise and rest as serving my family when it actually does.

My daughter deserves an energetic and happy mother. I really notice a difference when I play with my daughter after taking some time for myself and find that I am more focused, energetic and loving towards her. Because my needs are met, I am in a better position to meet hers.

My husband deserves a fun, happy, sexy wife. I am more loving towards him after I had been more loving towards myself.

I deserve to show myself off and be proud of who I am.

I want to project a positive self-image to other women and girls.

It’s time to come out of my shell and declare that I am a strong, energetic, beautiful and amazing woman.

I am strength

I am love

I am me

So are you.

Career Strategist and Empowerment Coach, Boni Candelario, has  a background in Industrial/Organizational Psychology and Human Resources. She assists people stuck in difficult career and life/balance situations. Her other passions include spending time with her family, traveling, ballroom dancing, and writing.Read her blog, Coach’m Up Boni.

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Today is All Souls’ Day, or El Dia de Los Muertos.

It isn’t about tears, but celebration and connection. A remembrance in bold colors, and fragrant flowers of the people to whom you are forever linked.

To whom are linked? Whom will you remember today…and always? How will you honor the connection?

click here to read the photo caption.

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Many, many years ago — a lifetime ago, actually — I went through what every human should maybe go through at least once: A period of introspection, a shedding and a rebirth. I don’t write about that time, though I do share it with those close to me who may need reassurance that all will be well. No matter what.

One morning back then, I turned the car radio to a station that played World music and Mercedes Sosa was singing “Gracias a la Vida.” I wept. “Thanks to Life.” It almost felt like a message heaven sent.

I did not know the song before that moment, but it became a personal anthem, and a when I need a reminder to begin and end my days with gratitude — no matter what has happened in those 24 hours — I blast it as loudly as I can from my iPod.

Sosa, a well-known and well-loved folk singer from Argentina, died this weekend in Buenos Aires. She was 74. As a fan I mourn her. Sosa’s talent will be missed, but her voice and her call to gratitude will go on.

What are you grateful for today?

Gracias a la Vida

Gracias a la Vida que me ha dado tanto
me dio dos luceros que cuando los abro
perfecto distingo lo negro del blanco
y en el alto cielo su fondo estrellado
y en las multitudes el hombre que yo amo.

Gracias a la vida, que me ha dado tanto
me ha dado el oido que en todo su ancho
graba noche y dia grillos y canarios
martillos, turbinas, ladridos, chubascos
y la voz tan tierna de mi bien amado.

Gracias a la Vida que me ha dado tanto
me ha dado el sonido y el abedecedario
con él las palabras que pienso y declaro
madre amigo hermano y luz alumbrando,
la ruta del alma del que estoy amando.

Gracias a la Vida que me ha dado tanto
me ha dado la marcha de mis pies cansados
con ellos anduve ciudades y charcos,
playas y desiertos montañas y llanos
y la casa tuya, tu calle y tu patio.

Gracias a la Vida que me ha dado tanto
me dio el corazón que agita su marco
cuando miro el fruto del cerebro humano,
cuando miro el bueno tan lejos del malo,
cuando miro el fondo de tus ojos claros.

Gracias a la Vida que me ha dado tanto
me ha dado la risa y me ha dado el llanto,
así yo distingo dicha de quebranto
los dos materiales que forman mi canto
y el canto de ustedes que es el mismo canto
y el canto de todos que es mi propio canto.

Gracias a la Vida
Gracias a la Vida
Gracias a la Vida
Gracias a la Vida.

Some English translations here.

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“Only if you reach the boundary will the boundary recede before you. And if you don’t, if you confine your efforts, the boundary will shrink to accommodate itself to your efforts. And you can only expand your capacities by working to the very limit.” —  Hugh Nibley

Are you pushing yourself to your greatest abilities today?

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“If you do not raise your eyes you will think that you are the highest point.” ~Antonio Porchia

This photograph of the Andes in Argentina comes from the beautiful travel photography site, Stuck in Customs.

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The same stream of life that runs through my veins night and day runs through the world and dances in rhythmic measures. It is the same life that shoots in joy through the dust of the earth in numberless blades of grass and breaks into tumultuous waves of leaves and flowers. It is the same life that is rocked in the ocean-cradle of birth and of death, in ebb and in flow. I feel my limbs are made glorious by the touch of this world of life. And my pride is from the life-throb of ages dancing in my blood this moment. — Rabindranth Tagore.

* The beautiful dancing woman was captured in the Pilsen neighborhood of Chicago, a colorful mosaic of Mexican and Latino culture. Click here to see more beautiful shots by the photographer who calls himself Señor Codo.

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