Please click the headline link to see Carrie pandering to Oprah Winfrey and her people.

So, Oprah Winfrey has put out a giant net and is casting for a talk  show host for her new network, OWN. Her site has had a place where you can submit video auditions. Well, I am late. Como siempre. The deadline has passed, but thanks to shamelessness and YouTube, (with tongue planted firmly in cheek) I am submitting my idea for Tiki Tiki Talk! to you, dear reader. And maybe the gods of Google Alerts and Twitter will send the message to La Oprah.

OK, so you’ll see the ideas in the video, but don’t you think America is ready for a talk show with segments such as:

• Dicho del Dia, to dissect and crack up over things like “sana, sana colita de rana” and “mango bajito.”
• Chancletaso of the Day, to point out los descarados in our culture and set them on the right path, Abuelita Style.
• Cooking with Dulce Leche (My TV kitchen would just have a deep fryer, Cuban bread and dulce leche. Only. Guests, like Salma, Pene, Javier, Juanes, Ricky! would be required to come up with creative uses for dulce leche…)
• Ask the Gringo Husband/Ask the Gringa Wife, a special segment by expert panelists who have survived and thrived in marriages to Latinos to help non-Latinos cope with the oddities and challenges of being married to one of us and out 17,000 relatives. (I have been trying to get my own husband to write this column for Tiki Tiki for a year!)

As I was putting this together, I remembered that at the beginning of my career in print journalism, one of my Tias kept telling me I was crazy to work for a newspaper, that I needed to be on TV…just like Giselle Fernandez . Well, Tia….your dream for me has kinda come true. And, imagine if Oprah really went for it? Ay!

So, enjoy my spoof and fantasy and consider adding your own TV show and segment ideas.

Dream big, gente. It’s the Web. Anything is possible.

******* We want to know your story! Share your cuentos, videos and fotos about growing up, and living Latino, in the U.S.How to contribute to the Tiki Tiki.Come on, no seas penosa!

Un poquito mas:

1. Charo, Shaki o Sofia as New Oprah? Oh, and Free Music Downloads for You
2. Tiki Tiki video: Mi Mama invento el Cappuccino
3. Vlogiando Week at the Tiki Tiki

I had the pleasure of seeing the woman behind the bag: Unknown Mami, a hilarious writer from San Francisco, who does not reveal her identity online. We sat next to each other on a bus ride in Miami when we both were invited to Que Rica Vida’s relaunch.

The the promise that I would keep her identity a secret, she did this video essay for the Tiki Tiki. It’s a story about what happens when your mostly Spanish-speaking mother buys you a “Miss You” card in English.

Watch and enjoy. And then go read her blog.

******* We want to know your story! Share your cuentos, videos and fotos about growing up, and living Latino, in the U.S.How to contribute to the Tiki Tiki.Come on, no seas penosa!

Un poquito mas:

1. Tiki Tiki video: Mi Mama invento el Cappuccino
2. Spanish Slang, Sayings, Palabras, Dichos
3. Contribute to the Tiki Tiki

If you are an e-mail or rss subscriber, please click the headline to see the videos.

Silvia from Mama Latina Tips is all sorts of fabulous. She is smart and tells wonderful cuentos. When I met her in Miami last month, I convinced her to tell some stories on video.

And, here they are.

In the first, Silvia describes what happens when the American groom does not understand the Mexican priest and in the second, she explains why her husband calls every man in the family “Pepe.”

Watch and enjoy.

Silvia is a former Human Resources executive who lives in California’s Central Valley with her loco husband of eight years and two traviesos sons. In an effort to express herself as a wife, mother, and multi-faceted Latina woman, she began Mama Latina Tips, a bilingual blog for Latina moms. Since that all wasn’t enough, she also blogs at Disneylandia al Día, a Spanish blog about the magic world of Disney.

******* We want to know your story! Share your cuentos, videos and fotos about growing up, and living Latino, in the U.S.How to contribute to the Tiki Tiki.Come on, no seas penosa!

Un poquito mas:

1. What Do You Call Your Abuela?
2. Vlogiando: I’m a Latina NASCAR Fan
3. How I Met My Gringo Husband

Calle Ocho (8th Street) in Southwest Miami is the heart of Little Havana. Every time we visit Miami, we go out of our way to eat at one particular place. You could even call it a type of “Mecca” for us West Coast Cubans.

Here is the spot that is the quintessential meeting place for Cubans when visiting Miami: Versailles Restaurant and Bakery.  There are lots of fabulous Cuban restaurants in lots of other places in Miami and of course, all of South Florida, (La Habana Vieja in Coral Gables comes to mind) but Versailles is definitely where Cubans come at all hours to “chismear” (gossip) and to have a little cortadito (espresso topped with steamed milk) and a pastelito de guayaba. The walk-up window boasts the peculiar distinction of serving over 1,000 espressos a day.

It’s here that you are guaranteed to find a gathering of some of the most fabulously Cuban Cubans. Love the food. Love the atmosphere. But most of all, I love the sound of the “tiki tiki.”

Armed with our video camera and instructions from my bossy, co-blogger, Carrie, my daughter and I went to Versailles to ask the question: “Que es el Tiki Tiki?”

The common answer seems to be that the “tiki tiki” is when someone keeps talking and talking and talking incessantly…. I’m thinking that pretty much describes us perfectly.

******* We want to know your story! Share your cuentos, videos and fotos about growing up, and living Latino, in the U.S.How to contribute to the Tiki Tiki.Come on, no seas penosa!

Un poquito mas:

1. What is el Tiki Tiki?
2. Dimelo Cantando: The Tiki Tiki Census, 2010
3. Tiki Tiki video: Mi Mama invento el Cappuccino

So, Marta and I hung out at Cuba Nostalgia in Miami this weekend. She was there to hang with her fans from Babalu Blog and I was there to terrorize people with my Flip cam. I shot a lot of video all weekend, directing people to explain just what the tiki tiki is, por favor.

If you’re Cuban, you know the tiki tiki is the constant talking, the habla habla, the chisme, the bochinche, the rhythm of chatter. But, we know at the Tiki Tiki Blog that we have a lot of non-Cuban readers, so we created a few videos this week capturing the heart of the Tiki Tiki.

In the first video, you’ll see the good people we grabbed at Cuba Nostalgia and in the second, you’ll see Marta explaining the Tiki Tiki so well — and you get a first-hand look at my bossy director self.

We’ll have a few videos this week, so stay tuned. They are absolutely hilarious — shot everywhere from Miami Beach to Versailles to Cuba Nostalgia. On the videos you’ll see everyone from popular Latina bloggers we were with for a special event put on by General Mills for its revamped Que Rica Vida site to waiters whom Marta’s daring and fabulous daughter, Kikita, stalked.

One video is of Ana Margarita Menendez, aka Carmencita on ¿Qué Pasa, U.S.A.? Ana Margo was generous and fun in creating a Tiki Tiki video for us..and I have to admit that when I walked away from filming her my knees were all shaky and I was emotional. (I was so overcome I shocked Marta, even!) That show is a touchstone of my childhood, so I am really grateful and excited about Ana Margo’s video.

So, check back to see more videos and get in on the tiki tiki!

******* We want to know your story! Share your cuentos, videos and fotos about growing up, and living Latino, in the U.S.How to contribute to the Tiki Tiki.Come on, no seas penosa!

Un poquito mas:

1. Tiki Tiki video: Mi Mama invento el Cappuccino
2. Vlogiando Week at the Tiki Tiki
3. Contribute to the Tiki Tiki

Miami, circa early '70s.

Note: Click the headline link to see the video in this Sponsored Post. Details below. Contest runs through MAY 14.

I have an aunt whose nickname is both “La Escobita” and “El Sargento.”

The Little Broom and The Sergeant.

God love her, she’s a trip-and-a-half.

When I was a snotty teen, La Escobita showed up at my grandmother’s, where I was doing nothing more than taking up space.

“Why haven’t you swept the house for your grandmother?” she asked me in Spanish, and holding the broom.

“Because she did it today already and I knew you were coming and you were going to do it all again,” I answered.

My grandmother swept a lot. She even swept and hosed down the front stoop daily, which I thought was a bit insane until I traveled to Cuba and the Dominican Republic and saw lots of ladies in their housedresses and chancletas doing the same thing in the early mornings.

It’s genetic. And, my guess it’s a necessary when you live in the salty-air of the Caribbean.

I hose down my porch just a few times a year to rid it of the green pollen that settles down from the woods around my house. And, I complain about how messy my house is with regularity, to which my non-Latina friends snicker and remind me that my house is pristine next to their own.

So, while I have fallen way short of the standards set by las cubanas in my life, something has stuck. I try. And, while I am a mad stacker —  as my husband calls me — I attempt to attain a working-mother’s version of my grandmother’s obsession with clean. Really, with the cultural dedication to clean. I cannot remember ever stepping into a Cuban woman’s house and thinking it dirty or messy.

Maybe like me, they hid their stacks?

But, I have to admit, it is my gringo husband who each spring announces that it is Spring Cleaning Week in the Woods. It is happening right now. All the furniture has been moved and every single rug and carpet has been steam cleaned. My sinks are sparkling and all dust bunnies have gone to heaven. It is a task I usually avoid by asking him to do it while I am away. This year, here I am.

In any case, when Clorox asked me to judge their “Mi Hogar Mi Orgullo” blogging contest, I said yes because I get it. (And so does the Molly Maid-loving Marta!)

A clean home, an organized home, is a gift to those who live in it.

Details on the contest direct from The Clorox Company

Background: Latina Moms take pride in their work at home. Whether we are career women or stay-at-home Moms, we surround our families with tangible evidence that everything we do is done with love and pride – from the food we put on the table, the band-aid we put on our child’s boo-boo, the fabric softener that brings a smell of home to our family’s clothing to keeping a clean home.
Preventing the spread of germs is one way to help keep our families from getting sick. We may not always love doing it but it is a labor of love.  Now that there is still the threat of H1N1 flu activity through the summer, it is important to protect our families and there are ways to achieve this at home, especially because Latinos are four times more likely to be hospitalized as a result of the H1N1 virus (Associated Press). It is in this spirit that Clorox is launching “Mi Hogar Mi Orgullo,” a Mommy blogger contest that collects stories of what keeping a clean house means to her, what gets her through the ickiest chores, and what tips she has to complete her cleaning routine as she juggles so many other activities.

How It Works:
Through May 14, blog about what “Mi Hogar Mi Orgullo” means to you, your cleaning and disinfecting routine, how you protect your family against the flu virus, how you’ve taught them to help prevent spreading germs – or any other cleaning/germ prevention topic that you’d like.Have other Moms comment on your “Mi Hogar Mi Orgullo” stories.

How to Win: Send us the links to your posts at editor@mihogarmiorgullo.com so we can see what you’ve written and any comments/buzz generated.

We will pick one grand prizewinner to become a featured colaboradora for three months on VidaySalud, the top Spanish site devoted to health with more than 1 million viewers. The grand prize winner will have a bio, photo and six columns featured in the main VidaySalud site and within the Casa Sana section of the site. All content, including photo and bio, will be archived on the site. The two runners up will win a large basket of Clorox® products. Winner will be selected May 10.

Judges:
Dr. Aliza Lifshitz, internist at Cedar-Sinai, editor-in-chief of Vida y Salud and health contributor for Univision.
Carrie Ferguson Weir, co-editor/co-publisher of Tiki Tiki Blog.
Ana Lilian Flores, co-editor/co-publisher of SpanglishBaby, an online community and blog for parents raising bilingual and bicultural children.

Frequently asked Questions:

What kind of content is Clorox looking for? Short, compelling, blog posts that do not need to mention any products but that:

· Offer cleaning/disinfecting advice

· Describe how you protect your family against germs

· Talk about how family traditions have influenced your cleaning routine

· What Mi Hogar, Mi Orgullo means to you

Just write the post on your site and email a link to editor@mihogarmiorgullo.com. (Also email this address for the official rules.)

Should I submit my entry in English or in Spanish? We are accepting entries in English and Spanish. Should you be selected as a winner, VidaySalud.com is a Spanish-language web site. We will provide any necessary translations should you be more comfortable writing in English.

What is Vida y Salud? Vida y Salud (www.vidaysalud.com) is the largest source of health and wellness information in Spanish on the web. Edited by Dr. Aliza Lifshitz, internist at Cedar-Sinai and health contributor for Univision, Vida y Salud has more 285,000 unique visitors per month and more than 1.5 million total visitors since it launched 10 months ago.

If I am selected as the grand prizewinner, will I be compensated for being a Vida y Salud contributor? There is no financial compensation; however there will be tremendous exposure for the winner. Your name and your blog will be included on Vida y Salud. Your posts on Vida y Salud will be under your byline and will include an author bio and a link to your blog. We will promote you and the fact that you are winning this competition.

How many articles will the grand prizewinner have to deliver to Vida y Salud? During the three month commitment, the winner will be asked to write six short articles under your byline on the topics of your choice (two articles a month) – no more than 300 words per article. As mentioned above, translation will be provided if needed. If you would like to see samples of the articles visit VidaySalud in Casa Sana section.

This post was paid for, and sponsored by, The Clorox Company

******* We want to know your story! Share your cuentos, videos and fotos about growing up, and living Latino, in the U.S.How to contribute to the Tiki Tiki.Come on, no seas penosa!

Un poquito mas:

1. Contest: All about Cotton and Algodón
2. How to be a Green Latina
3. “Somebody” Knows or Living with a Suegra

Ed. Note: Please click the headline to see the video

By Yolanda Mason

I still remember like it was yesterday when my now husband faxed me a copy of the tickets for our first date: It was the last NASCAR Winston Cup race at Homestead!

At that time, I had no idea what I was getting into… NASCAR and golf are the two events my husband enjoys and I have learned to like them because, after all,  marriage is a team, right?

I still enjoy watching the confused faces on my family, friends and acquaintances when I tell them I am a NASCAR fan. They look at me like I am talking about aliens. Y ni hablar when we try to watch a race while visiting Puerto Rico!

Nowadays, I know about a few stats and rules, met a few drivers, have visited a few tracks and am comfortable talking “NASCAR” although my hope is to be able to do so with many more Latinos.

I guess my husband is right, I’m getting a little country, after all.

Yoly Mason is a Latina blogger. You can find her most of the time working at her couponing blog Cuponeando or vlogging on her personal blog YNR Live, which she does with her Southerner husband.

******* We want to know your story! Share your cuentos, videos and fotos about growing up, and living Latino, in the U.S.How to contribute to the Tiki Tiki.Come on, no seas penosa!

Un poquito mas:

1. Vlogiando: What Are You?
2. Vlogiando Week at the Tiki Tiki
3. Smart Latina vs. Sexy Latina

(Ed. Note: Click the headline link to see the video)

My mom, Luz, as most of you already know, is 96-years-old. She reads a lot and is still very sharp for her advanced age. She has seen quite a few amazing things in her lifetime and still tells stories of listening to music on the first radio her family owned and being in awe of the sound traveling through the air.

She is still a little wide-eyed when it comes to understanding how a computer works, let alone the internet.

One day, I overheard her explaining to my 99-year-old Tio Fernando about these two know-it-alls: Cuco and Yayo who have a giant net where they accumulate information.

Wait….Cuco and Yayo? She’s talking about Google and Yahoo.

I swear, I can’t make this stuff up.

You may want to get some popcorn for this. Enjoy.

******* We want to know your story! Share your cuentos, videos and fotos about growing up, and living Latino, in the U.S.How to contribute to the Tiki Tiki.Come on, no seas penosa!

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I’ve talked about this before on my other blog, Bilingual in the Boonies. My husband thinks I am way much more fun in Spanish-speaking countries — and that includes Miami.

I agree with him.

It is most obvious to me just how vanilla I can be when my family is here visiting. I hear the music in their words, notice the crazy and the pal’ carajo in their attitude. I’m a little too protestant sometimes,  if truth be told.

My father is not. Yes, he is a pain in the fotingo about whether the doors are all locked and about how quickly Maria brushes her teeth after dinner, but he’s kinda typical Cuban — pretty easy and generally joyful.

Witness Papi and Maria playing pick-up sticks. He’s not acting. He’s being himself. 100% It is why my house is very quiet when he is gone. Also notice my kid cheating her 72-year-old Abuelito in the game.

I am everlastingly grateful my kid gets regular doses of the viejos who fill her house with something besides: “Did you wash your hands?” and “Eat some more peas.”

******* We want to know your story! Share your cuentos, videos and fotos about growing up, and living Latino, in the U.S.How to contribute to the Tiki Tiki.Come on, no seas penosa!

Un poquito mas:

1. Researching El Ratón
2. Eu de Papi
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Grandparent Detox:Dealing With Kids After a Sleepover At Grandparents House

By Lizzie Bermudez

I love that my girls get to see my parents quite often. And I love it even more that my parents are always up for hosting the gals for a few nights. I’m telling ya, it’s like a win-win. The girls get great bonding time with their grandparents and the hubby and I get to reconnect.

But what I can’t stand is the 48-hour “grandparent detox” period I have to endure when my daughters return from visiting with Lolo and Nana.

Take a look.

What happens when your kids come back from visiting the Abuelos?

Lizzie Bermudez is a television reporter who recently launched lizziebtv.com. She lives in San Francisco with her husband and two daughters.

******* We want to know your story! Share your cuentos, videos and fotos about growing up, and living Latino, in the U.S.How to contribute to the Tiki Tiki.Come on, no seas penosa!

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